In the first few weeks after Darcey was born I overheard someone ask Matthew what the most difficult thing was about having a newborn, and he replied ‘definitely the feeding’. I found that so strange! We were solely breast feeding so as the ‘one with the boobs’ I wondered why it was so hard for him.
I now understand it was the only thing he couldn’t help with at a time when I was at my weakest, but also it was feeding that dictated our days and nights. (And still does to some degree)
Feeding a newborn is a mind field and I definitely wasn’t prepared for how quickly everything changes!
We were really lucky that Darcey took to breast feeding well, but in the first week or so I still needed some reassurance so we popped into our local breast feeding clinic which was valuable. The health visitor basically watched me feed and gave me some pointers.
Lots of friends have asked if it hurts, my experience is that it’s strange and maybe uncomfortable to begin with but you soon get used to it, as do your nipples! But until then lather on that cream!
Darcey used to feed for up to an hour at a time! With about an hour and a half gap between feeds! This gradually got better, she was a little and often girl though and I was told that a newborn cannot overeat so if she’s asking for it always feed her.
Something I wish someone had advised me was to offer a bottle regularly once breast feeding was established. We were told by good old google not to offer a bottle until atleast 12 weeks as it may affect her ability to breast feed. So week 12 I was all prepared with my pump and bottles, only to find that there was no way this little lady was going to take them!! We persevered for a couple of months.
Then a friend casually asked of we had moved on to teet size 3 yet? I had no idea what this meant but evidently babies use different size teets depending on their age- who knew?! After months of struggling Darcey then took the bottle! She still only tolerated it for a few minutes but after another few weeks of perseverance she then took a whole feed!
Again good old google suggested that she should be taking a lot more than she was initially but breast feeding babies often take a while to up their intake and have bigger gaps between feeds.
She’s now taking most feeds from the bottle with typically two breast feeds a day. And it is so freeing to finally be able to leave her for longer and for Matthew to help with some feeds. We are on to formula now as I’m back to work soon.
Note on formula – apparently the government rules on formulas ingredients is so strict that they all contain the same thing, so we are using Aldi’s which is much cheaper.
We are also weaning. We started at around 5 1/2 months as she was desperately trying to get hold of our food. We found it also helped with teething. At the moment she has a mixture of purée and finger foods. I purée at the weekends and freeze individual portion as well as buying ready made packs.
Portion sizes are more or less led by her, she has breakfast and dinner with a snack at lunch.
I am glad I invested in some decent feeding bras but found most nursing clothing to be a faff and ended up wearing vest tops under everything which was easier to manage.
I’ve been breast feeding for almost 7 months now and am ready to move on and not have to wear accessible clothing anymore!! If you’ve just started then be reassured time passes quickly and you will soon have some of your independence back.
We are still learning and this is just what worked for us, but I thought I’d jot something down as I wish I’d had some of this information earlier. There seems to be a lot of stigma around feeding so most accounts I follow tend not to share their experience very openly, I hope this helps someone.
Thanks for reading!
Naomi x
Fearless Fathers 